Classic SNL Review: February 28, 1987: Valerie Bertinelli / The Robert Cray Band (S12E13)

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RATINGS SYSTEM:
***** - Classic
**** - Great
*** - Good/Average
** - Meh
* - Awful

OPENING: AFFAIR

  • Don Regan (Kevin Nealon) discusses the Tower Commission report with Ronald Reagan (Phil Hartman); Regan’s frosty public relationship with Nancy Reagan (Jan Hooks) turns out to be cover for an affair between the two.

  • Phil Hartman’s Reagan impression returns, though this time the portrayal is more in line with the others portraying the President as a doddering old man. This allows for some amusing runs involving Regan offering increasingly smaller summaries of the report, as well as Reagan listing a number of topics that he doesn’t know much about.

  • Jan Hooks’s Nancy Reagan impression debuts here; it’s not as instantly memorable as Terry Sweeney’s take on the first lady, but Hooks is pretty much playing her straight here.

  • Was Hooks’s laughter at Hartman’s wink to the camera a genuine character break?

  • Written by Al Franken and Tom Davis.

  • Rerun alterations: Everything from Hartman’s exit up to the close-up when he re-enters is from dress rehearsal.

*** 1/2

MONOLOGUE

  • Valerie Bertinelli talks about her attempts to outgrow her “girl-next-door” image.

  • A bit of a tepid monologue with a few groan-worthy jokes (Bertinelli comparing the show to a Van Halen concert, the “woman next door” punch line).

  • Bertinelli was promoting Number One with a Bullet, which opened the day before; the movie had among its cowriters former SNLers Jim Belushi, Andrew Kurtzman, and Rob Riley.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

**

COMMERCIAL: MCSOOSHI (repeat of 12/13/86)

SKETCH: DINNER AT THE VAN HALEN’S

  • Roadies (Kevin Nealon, Dana Carvey, and Dennis Miller) work while Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen have dinner with friends (Phil Hartman and Victoria Jackson).

  • This kind of felt like an easy concept (and mainly a way to work Bertinelli’s then-husband into a sketch), but the detail of the whole bit and the performances of Carvey, Nealon and Miller manage to put it over.

  • Rerun alterations: Audience applause mixed out of opening title and replaced with cricket sound effect. A small cut when Phil Hartman stands to pour the wine.

***

SKETCH: HARD NEWS CAFE

  • News junkies (Phil Hartman and Valerie Bertinelli) eat at the journalism themed restaurant where Sam Donaldson (Kevin Nealon) has lunch with Ted Koppel (Dana Carvey).

  • I enjoyed this one; another high-concept bit, but they go all out on this one, with patrons shouting for the waitress press-conference style, the two diners trading Senate hearing bootlegs, and a cameo from Edwin Newman as the bouncer. The scene with Koppel and Donaldson is pretty fun too.

  • Interesting hearing a mention of Joe Biden as a potential nominee for the Democrats in 1988, especially now that he’s currently President at the time of this writing.

  • The guy in the booth with Lovitz looks a bit like Bob Odenkirk.

  • Written by Al Franken, Robert Smigel, Jon Vitti, with other contributors.

  • Rerun alterations: Applause mixed over opening still photo.

****

SHOW: DISCOVER

  • Host Peter Graves (Phil Hartman) lacks basic knowledge about chemical elements.

  • This is a favourite of mine, with Phil Hartman’s dim Peter Graves getting some good lines from his complete misunderstanding of the subject at hand (I particularly like his analogy of gold being “like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar” after being told of its malleability). Lovitz is an excellent straight man here too, contrasting nicely with Graves’ cheerful dippiness.

  • Written by Phil Hartman.

  • Rerun alterations: Alarm sound mixed quieter in rerun.

**** 1/2

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “SMOKING GUN”

  • The crossover hit from Robert Cray’s 1986 breakthrough album Strong Persuader; polished but passionate blues soul with a nice guitar solo.

  • Rerun alterations: None

WEEKEND UPDATE

  • Best jokes: Iran-Contra, Andy Warhol, Beatles CDs, Hoosiers

  • Opening music: “War Pigs” by Black Sabbath

  • Very strong night for Dennis Miller, particularly the run of Iran-Contra jokes at the beginning (which also included him using “What can I tell ya” as his opening line for the first time, though it was part of a joke).

  • The remote with the winner (Jon Lovitz) of the “Lost Weekend with David Lee Roth (Dana Carvey)” contest was quite funny, with Carvey’s manic Diamond Dave dominating the scene, as well as Lovitz’s performance as the frightened contestant.

  • Kevin Nealon returns with a Thoughtful Insight about tax season, where in between cliches he tells stories about a bad accountant, getting a computer, and filling in last year’s form. I thought this was an improvement over the last one in Shaffer.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

****

SKETCH: PET CHICKEN SHOP

  • After sister Loose (Nora Dunn) mocks his lack of a love life, Ching Change (Dana Carvey) thinks a woman (Valerie Bertinelli) who comes into the shop to use the phone is his perfect match.

  • The audience really liked this one, but again the stereotypical portrayals make this one hard for me to enjoy. This time out, Nora Dunn is added to the sketch as Ching’s sister Loose (whose name is part of a series of jokes about the family surname), and she and Ching have an argument in fake Chinese gibberish that gets a good reaction.

  • I also found the main plotline made Ching seem too pathetic even by normal standards.

  • Written by Dana Carvey and Robert Smigel.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

*1/2

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “STOMPIN’ 8H”

  • This was a blast; an original song co-written by Eddie Van Halen and G.E. Smith, with horn arragement by Lenny Pickett. A great way to use both Van Halen and the SNL Band, and easily one of the more memorable musical performances over the show’s history.

  • Ultimate Classic Rock has an article and a link to a G.E. Smith interview where he discusses the background story behind this performance.

  • Valerie Bertinelli is wearing a 91X button during her introduction.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

COMMERCIAL: WASHINGTON CENTER I

  • Spokeswoman (Nora Dunn) promotes the affordable plastic surgery clinic.

  • Not rateable on its own, but worth noting in that this segment is presented as a completely serious commercial without any apparent jokes.

  • Directed by James Signorelli.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

SHOW: LET’S GO TO THE MOVIES

  • College students Chrissy (Valerie Bertinelli) and Bobbi (Jan Hooks) review The Color of Money.

  • Not really a whole lot to write about, despite some funny parts (loved the segue from the high pitched squealing to “Anyway, Paul Newman is also in this movie”). It’s mostly a vehicle for Bertinelli and Hooks’ characterizations.

  • Written by Robert Smigel and Jon Vitti.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

** 1/2

COMMERCIAL: WASHINGTON CENTER II

  • Spokeswoman (Nora Dunn) advises of legal representation available to those disfigured by low-cost plastic surgery clinics.

  • A well-executed brick joke; I love hearing the audience as it clues in here.

  • Directed by James Signorelli.

  • Rerun alterations: Audience mixed lower than in live episode; band shot also remixed.

**** 1/2

SHOW: ON BROADWAY

  • Yul Brynner’s shadow has been difficult for his replacement (Phil Hartman) in The King and I to deal with.

  • This is another one I’ve always enjoyed, and Phil Hartman’s performance as the bitter Ross Treadway is easily one of his best. As good as he is, though, it’s Nora Dunn who walks away with the sketch with her walk-on as Ross’s wife (“You all seem to want Yul Brynner? Dig him up!”)

  • Written by George Meyer.

  • Rerun alterations: None.

**** 1/2

SKETCH: OPERA SINGER DOCTOR

  • Lethally incompetent Dr. Lieberman (Jon Lovitz) regrets not chasing his dream of being an opera singer.

  • A good premise, with some funny dark jokes throughout (particularly the nurse’s blasé “Is he dead yet?” after Carvey’s character drops) and a nice excuse for Lovitz to show off his operatic skills.

  • Rerun alterations: Small cut when Lovitz tells Hartman “I became a doctor instead” to remove a stumble.

*** 1/2

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “RIGHT NEXT DOOR”

  • A slightly moodier number than the first one. The keyboards give this one a real 80s feel, but again Cray’s vocals and guitar playing are quite good.

  • Rerun alterations: Valerie Bertinelli’s introduction is from dress rehearsal. The audience applause is mixed out until a few seconds later in the rerun.

GOODNIGHTS

  • With an extra minute to kill, Valerie Bertinelli thanks Lorne Michaels and Dinah [Minot], proclaims “This cast is the best cast in television anywhere!”, says hi to a number of people as Dana Carvey tries to get her to say wife Paula’s name, and eventually says “Oh, shut up Dennis!” in mock annoyance.

  • Bonnie and Terry Turner are again credited as guest writers.

  • Don Pardo announces the show returns live on March 21 with host Bill Murray, mentions the Robin Williams show repeating next week and wrestling to look forward to on the 14th, and closes by saying he’s thinking of giving up announcing for Lent. (“Who knows? I have no willpower!”).

  • Rerun alterations: Audience noise and Pardo voiceover removed from closing theme.

Final thoughts: This turned out to be quite the show; in fact, I would almost say it was in spite of Valerie Bertinelli. Not that she was bad; she was more forgettable than anything else. However, her hosting gig did lead to a memorable one-off musical performance. This really felt more like the cast and writers’ show than anything else, though, and it was a particularly good night for Phil Hartman, who does some of his best-remembered work here.

SHOW HIGHLIGHTS:

  • On Broadway

  • Discover

  • Washington Center

  • Hard News Cafe

  • Weekend Update

  • Affair

  • Opera Singer Doctor

SHOW LOWLIGHTS:

  • Pet Chicken Shop

  • Monologue

MVP:

  • Phil Hartman

CAST & GUEST BREAKDOWN:

cast

  • Dana Carvey: 5 appearances [Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Hard News Cafe, Weekend Update, Pet Chicken Shop, Opera Singer Doctor]

  • Nora Dunn: 5 appearances [Hard News Cafe, Pet Chicken Shop, Washington Center I, Washington Center II, On Broadway]

  • Phil Hartman: 6 appearances [Affair, Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Hard News Cafe, Discover, On Broadway, Opera Singer Doctor]

  • Jan Hooks: 3 appearances [Affair, Let’s Go To The Movies, On Broadway]

  • Victoria Jackson:: 2 appearances [Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Hard News Cafe]

  • Jon Lovitz: 4 appearances [Hard News Cafe, Discover, Weekend Update, Opera Singer Doctor]

  • Dennis Miller: 2 appearances [Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Weekend Update]

featured players

  • A. Whitney Brown: 1 appearance [Opera Singer Doctor]

  • Kevin Nealon: 5 appearances [Affair, Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Hard News Cafe, Weekend Update, Pet Chicken Shop]

unbilled crew, extras, and bit players

  • Tom Davis: 1 voiceover [Hard News Cafe]

  • Don Pardo: 1 voiceover [Weekend Update]

  • Robert Smigel: 1 voiceover [Let’s Go To The Movies]

G.E. Smith and the Saturday Night Live Band

  • G.E. Smith and the Saturday Night Live Band: 1 appearance [“Stompin’ 8H”]

guests

  • Valerie Bertinelli: 6 appearances [Monologue, Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Hard News Cafe, Pet Chicken Shop, Let’s Go To The Movies, Opera Singer Doctor]

  • The Robert Cray Band: 2 appearances [“Smoking Gun”, “Right Next Door”]

  • Edwin Newman: 1 appearance [Hard News Cafe]

  • Eddie Van Halen: 2 appearances [Dinner at the Van Halen’s, “Stompin’ 8H”]

REBROADCAST HISTORY:

  • June 13, 1987

  • September 19, 1987

Known alterations:

  • Edits: Dinner at the Van Halen’s, Opera Singer Doctor

  • Dress substitutions: Affair, “Right Next Door” intro.

  • Audio remixing: Washington Center II, “Right Next Door”.

Additional screen captures from this episode are available here.